Communication Breakdown
June 25th, 2008 Edit
As I was driving past the middle and the high schools yesterday, something occurred to me; the communication between teachers and parents has a tendency to fall apart or become nonexistent by the time children reach the middle school level. Once high school rolls around, many parents don’t even hear from the school or have contact with the administrators or the teachers unless their teen gets in to some sort of trouble.
Why is that? Why do we allow the schools to dictate when they want to hear from us? Last year was my son’s first year of middle school. On every occasion in which something was going on with him, I had to initiate the conversation. In a couple of instances it was only after multiple emails were sent where I said, “Hey I called and left a message for you, I haven’t heard back…” did I get a reply. We as parents tend to think that communication at the elementary school level is important – and so do the teachers: School wide newsletters as well as classroom newsletters get sent home, we have parent teacher conferences at every grading period, and if you’re lucky enough, you get a teacher who will call you just to see if everything is OK because little Suzy or Billy isn’t quite themselves this week.
However, when we get to middle school and high school, those letters, the phone calls and the conferences come to a screeching halt. It’s now up the parents to make the first move if we want to hear about how our kids are doing. Between middle and high school more kids fall victim to drugs, alcohol and suicide than any other time. It’s when the pressure to perform, to fit in and find their own sense of self takes control.
Once the schools reopen their offices and the teachers start reporting to school to set up their classrooms, make an appointment to at least meat the teachers face to face. You want to know who they are, and you need to make your presence as your son or daughter’s advocate known. Introduce yourself and let them know that just as you expect them to have an open door policy for your child to come to them with problems, be it social or academic, you also have an open door policy for them to approach you as well. Let them know that as a parent, you have a duty to your teen to help them do their best so you may request a sit down with them if you see your teen suddenly starts having problems.
It’s their job to teach your child what they need to succeed in this world and unfortunately, it’s become our job as parents to keep those lines of communication between home and school going.
Entry Filed under: Education Activist, Parent Activist, Parent Involvement, advocacy, communication, family, high school, issues, middle school, public education, school success, teachers
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1. ravyn | June 28th, 2008 at 10:27 pm
Strongly written.
How much of that effect do you consider to be on the school side, and how much on the parent side? I’ve noticed a lot less parent involvement outside of activity courses as the age of the students increases; might that have something to do with it?
Edit Comment2. Alicia | July 13th, 2008 at 10:35 pm
I teach 3rd grade and I see what you are saying. I try to make multiple attempts throughout the school year to meet or talk with each and every parent. I definately notice the difference in the childs performance when the parents are involved. I don’t know the communication stops in the higher grades but I can guess some might have to do with the fact that the teachers have so many kids they teach each day in each period that it is almost impossible to contact each student’s parents.
Edit Comment3. Alicia | July 13th, 2008 at 10:38 pm
I teach 3rd grade and I know exactly what you are talking about. I try to contact each student’s parents multiple times throughout the year. I definatley see the difference in the child’s performance when the parents are highly involved. In the upper grades I can only guess communication fails due to teachers having soo many students they teach in each period that it is almost impossible to contact each childs parent on a regular basis.
Edit Comment4. TMinut | July 19th, 2008 at 1:11 am
My son has been in public school most of his school years, his middle school was really good about keeping a newsletter coming. They posted assignments and grades online for parent viewing as well. Now we’ve moved, if he goes back to school, I’ll see what this one is like.
Edit Comment5. halahblue | August 16th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
I think the internet can play a integral role in solving this problem, however many districts still couldn’t handle implementing an online teacher/parent/student system. I know my alma mater has a meager, annually updated website.
I think until there are more teachers in general that parents will need to be more proactive than they should probably be expected to be. However, proactive parents seem to have children who’re proactive in their own education, which is never a bad thing.
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